Tuesday, March 17, 2009

3 Possible Conspiracy Truths

Truth is hard to find. I'm sorry for keeping you waiting, but you can't rush genius. Here's something to tide you over.

Conspiracies and lies permeate the everyday truth. I was scanning some recent articles around the web, and I found the following articles. My opinions and thoughts below. I'm not crazy. I don't think all of these are necessarily true, but maybe 1-2. These will need more looking into.

1. Ryan Seacrest is a Government Secret Agent
-Where does the government hide one of its biggest and most successful spies?

On a popular reality TV show that people only have mild interest in.

American Idol has been going on for years now. People have won constantly, but as far as record contracts go, no one has gotten anything remotely resembling a significant record contract. On top of that, the majority of the judges are completely tone-deaf and manage to pick pretty kids who can barely sing or have a thought for themselves. Why have a show where the prizes are never handed out? Why pick such oblivious contestants? Doesn't the whole thing just seem so fake? It's all to hide Seacrest's secret life as a government agent.

Think about it. Where do you hide a major government secret? In plain sight. Simpleton contestants, fake prizes, excuses to travel internationally, tone-deaf judges, fake show, and a B-list celebrity that can get into any event, party, or gala he wants. On top of all of this, doesn't Ryan Seacrest always seem so shallow, superficial, and plastic in his emotions that he just can't be true. Like he's hiding a true self under that cheery exterior. It all makes sense if you think about it.

The government knew that American Idol would be JUST popular enough for people to watch it, but not enough for 90% of America to take it seriously 2 years after its release. Governments are incredibly good at finding spies.

2. Battlestar Galactica Writers Have Had Help
-The writers of a mildly popular show on an exceedingly unpopular network. They had to have help from some form of extraterrestrials, right? Right.

The writers of Battlestar Galactica have made first contact and used their extensive knowledge of alien culture to write a popular futuristic show. The aliens were replace with humans and cylons to protect the identities of the real place and beings this happened to?

How do I know this?

The U.N. figured it out. They've invited the writers to come talk about human rights and various other topics. Who invites TV writers to give serious political commentary to an organization that handles the majority of Global Politics. NO ONE! They wouldn't have invited the writers unless they knew something really important. Aliens.

3. Small Time Comic Publishers Lace Their Pages with Trace Amounts of LSD to Sell Comics made by Inferior Writers

This one's so obvious, I'm almost tempted to believe there's a bigger conspiracy (like the comics contain a secret code to terrorists since they're the only one that would buy this). Still, I can't explain the existence of THIS as a viable comic book without the inclusion of heavy drug-usage.

"Readers don't want to read about Superheroes, explosions, and drama, Harry. They want positive female role-models".

Don't get me wrong. I believe in women's rights as much as anybody, but this is just a ridiculous idea. You're using a medium that's generally a boy's club to appeal to female viewers? Apparently, the writer's thought Palin's statement about being able to see Russia from her house was an admission of superpowers and not just a dumb statement.

Honestly, this publisher NEEDS drugs to sell their product, and I think this time they accidentally touched some of the finished product.

Anyway, this just goes to show that everywhere you go, you're being lied to. Oh, and watch out for those comics.

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